{"id":37694,"date":"2020-07-25T06:00:52","date_gmt":"2020-07-24T21:00:52","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.panamera-life.com\/?p=37694"},"modified":"2021-06-01T22:59:27","modified_gmt":"2021-06-01T13:59:27","slug":"car-life-couple","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.panamera-life.com\/en\/entry\/car-life-couple\/","title":{"rendered":"Thoughts on Enjoying Car Life as a Couple"},"content":{"rendered":"

Cars as a Shared Hobby<\/h3>\n

My husband has loved cars since we first met.<\/strong> At that time, I had no interest in cars at all, but gradually I became interested, started writing a Porsche blog, and now I love cars even more than before.<\/p>\n

Lately, we\u2019ve even started talking about cars almost every day and going on test drives together as a couple.<\/p>\n

That said, when my husband regularly goes on long tours, drives 3,000 km, and still says, “I haven\u2019t driven enough yet<\/strong>,” or when he chooses to drive to a business trip in Tokyo instead of taking the Shinkansen, these things are a bit beyond my beginner\u2019s understanding of car enthusiasm\u2026 haha.<\/p>\n

But from an outside perspective, I think we probably come across as a couple who enjoy a shared passion for cars.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

A Wife Who Understands Her Husband\u2019s Car Hobby<\/h3>\n

Regarding our relationship, I often receive messages saying, “Mina-san really understands her husband\u2019s hobby<\/strong>.”<\/p>\n

From the time we met until now, I have never denied or restricted my husband\u2019s enjoyment of his car hobby<\/strong>(I think! lol)<\/span>. Whether he buys his favorite car, goes on long tours, travels wherever and stays overnight, I just want him to enjoy it freely. I think readers see this and feel that I\u2019m understanding.<\/p>\n

But this is also because I\u2019ve been given freedom since we got married, so I want him to have the same freedom<\/strong>, and because I\u2019ve seen how cars motivate him and positively influence his work<\/strong>, I feel it\u2019s perfectly fine for him to enjoy it to the fullest.(I\u2019ve written about this before in a past article<\/a>.)<\/span><\/p>\n

Also, recently I\u2019ve realized that I\u2019ve never consciously tried to “understand my husband\u2019s hobby<\/strong>” or made an effort to “be a wife who accepts his freedom<\/strong>.”<\/p>\n

I think if you approach it as an effort, you might unknowingly build up stress and eventually explode, making it hard to keep up.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Instead, I think we naturally have this understanding because our senses of what\u2019s important and what doesn\u2019t bother us in life are very similar<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Our personalities are completely different\u2014he\u2019s logical, I\u2019m intuitive\u2014but at the core, we feel very alike, and people often say we\u2019re a “like-minded couple<\/strong>.”<\/p>\n

Trusting Our Own Feelings Over Others\u2019 Opinions<\/h3>\n

What feels especially similar is that we both tend to “not care much about what others (society) do and decide things based on our own feelings<\/strong>.”<\/p>\n

When we make decisions at home, we rarely think, “Everyone else does it this way, so we should too.” Instead, it\u2019s always, “We think this is good, so let\u2019s do it,” “It feels comfortable for us, so let\u2019s go with that.”<\/strong> Often, this differs from common social norms.<\/p>\n

Writing it like this might make us sound indifferent or socially out of sync\u2026 but since we both left organizations to become independent, maybe that\u2019s true! lol<\/p>\n

For example, when my husband goes on a long tour, I often go back to my parents\u2019 house with our daughters. He gets to fully enjoy driving alone, and I get a break from housework and childcare at my parents\u2019, so we\u2019re both happy.<\/strong> This is normal for us, but apparently our parents and others think it\u2019s “unusual.”<\/p>\n

Also, most of our eldest daughter\u2019s friends do extracurriculars like Kumon, piano, cram school, swimming, and dance. I\u2019ve been invited a few times by other moms, but<\/p>\n

“Well\u2026 if she wants to do something, that\u2019s fine, but she doesn\u2019t seem interested when I ask her.<\/strong>” So time just passed, and our daughter has never done any lessons and still doesn\u2019t.<\/p>\n

I admire friends who do lessons\u2014they already know what\u2019s taught in first grade and write beautifully\u2014but that doesn\u2019t make us feel pressured or say, “We should enroll our child too!”<\/p>\n

Regarding our home, most of my husband\u2019s friends seem to have bought houses, and our parents once said, “Stop buying cars all the time and get a house first!?<\/strong>” But we always conclude, “Well, we don\u2019t really need one right now,” so we\u2019ve stayed renting.<\/p>\n

More than these things, we tend to focus inwardly on<\/p>\n

“How can we live more comfortably every day?<\/strong>” and “What should we study now to reach the next stage?<\/strong>” We\u2019re always tuned in to these questions, so maybe that\u2019s why we don\u2019t pay much attention to others.<\/p>\n

We\u2019re probably both a bit unusual! lol<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

This got a bit long, but basically, when it comes to car hobbies, we strongly feel “it\u2019s important to have an environment where we can freely enjoy what we love<\/strong>,” so we don\u2019t want to restrict each other\u2019s freedom. Also, freedom comes with responsibility, so although we don\u2019t say it out loud, we both value the idea that “If you\u2019re free, you have to take responsibility properly.”<\/p>\n

A Car Life That Fits Your Couple Style<\/h3>\n

Our family happens to enjoy car life this way, but I believe there are many ways for couples to enjoy car life without forcing it.<\/p>\n

What works best varies greatly depending on each couple\u2019s values and way of thinking.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

Some couples love driving together but the wife prefers to stay in the passenger seat, others want the wife to drive more, some look forward more to the inn at the destination than the drive itself, or some want to drive two cars together\u2026 Finding a way to enjoy car life that fits your couple\u2019s style and feelings is probably the key.<\/p>\n

And as children grow, these preferences change, and there\u2019s no one right way. We hope to keep refining and improving our own car life going forward.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"Cars as a Shared Hobby My husband has loved cars since we first met. At that time, I had no interest in cars at all, but gradually I became interested, started writing a Porsche blog, and now I love cars even more than before. Lately, we\u2019ve even started talking about cars almost every day and going on test drives together as a couple. That said, when my husband regularly goes on long tours, drives 3,000...","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":19039,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_locale":"en_US","_original_post":"https:\/\/www.panamera-life.com\/?p=19019"},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"Thoughts on Enjoying Car Life as a Couple - \u30dd\u30eb\u30b7\u30a7\u304c\u308f\u304c\u5bb6\u306b\u3084\u3063\u3066\u304d\u305f - \u30aa\u30fc\u30ca\u30fc\u30ba\u30d6\u30ed\u30b0<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"As a car-loving couple, we\u2019re often asked about tips for enjoying car life together. 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