My Husband’s Road Trips

Whenever he has an extended break, my husband often heads out on a long solo road trip in his car. Depending on how much time he has, he might be gone for two nights and three days or a whole week, and his destination could be Tohoku or Shikoku. His dream, he says, is to spend a solid month on the road someday（笑）

When you hear “road trip,” you might picture a fun journey in your favorite car, with stops at tourist attractions and plenty of chances to sample local specialties. That’s not how my husband does it.

Apparently, he barely stops for lunch and spends the whole day driving—from morning until night, sometimes for as long as 12 hours.

What is this, some kind of endurance test? (-_-)w

The other night, I called him while he was away on a road trip. His voice was hoarse, so I asked, “What happened?!I haven’t spoken to a single person all day. This is basically the first time I’ve opened my mouth, so my voice isn’t coming out properly.” （笑）

I once asked him, “Why push yourself so hard to drive? Since you’ve gone somewhere new, why not try the local food or take it easy and get some rest?” He replied:

I don’t need any of that. I’ve come all this way to drive roads that are too far away to visit on an ordinary day. If I were traveling with the family, that’d be different, but stopping to eat or relax would be a waste of time. More than anything, I want to spend every possible minute behind the wheel.

Sure enough, after his last long road trip, my husband came home looking a little thinner, with a smaller-looking face w

He also doesn’t stay at hot-spring inns or luxurious hotels on these trips. More often than not, he chooses a Route Inn.

I asked him, “Why do you always stay at Route Inn?”

Route Inn hotels usually have pretty spacious parking lots. They’re also often located near expressway exits, which makes them convenient for road trips. The rates are reasonable, and breakfast is included for free, so they’re good value, too.
I usually decide on a general direction and then play it by ear on the day, so it’s a hassle to look for somewhere to stay each time. Route Inn hotels are all over Japan, and the service is pretty consistent, so you can’t really go wrong with one.
I’ve stayed at Route Inn hotels all over the country. I’ve stayed so many times that I feel like I could write a whole blog about the features and little differences at each location.

That was his explanation.

A Road Trip Is Like a Training Retreat

My husband loves cars and driving, and says there’s no greater pleasure than exploring Japan’s beautiful roads. But he also says that taking a solo road trip is an important chance to think things through on his own.

It gives him time to reflect on his personal goals and the future of his company, and to sort through his thoughts.

For me, a road trip is kind of like a monk walking through the mountains to train w That’s why I drive with such single-minded dedication.

That’s how he once put it.

The first time I heard him say that, I thought, “Oh, come on—you’re making it sound so noble.” But when he comes back from a road trip, he often seems refreshed, saying things like, “I’ve thought it all through, and this is the direction I’m going to take” or “I’ve figured out a new goal.” These days, I can see that road trips matter to him in all kinds of ways.

What I Think When My Husband Goes on a Long Road Trip

When I write about this, people often tell me, “Mina, you’re such an understanding wife to be okay with your husband going on solo road trips.” The truth is, I’m not nearly that perfect a wife（笑）

I’m not the type to put up with things and just go along with what my husband wants, or to devote myself to supporting him. I simply think, “I get to do what I want day to day, so he should be free to do what he wants, too.”

So when my husband heads out on a solo road trip, I take the kids to my parents’ house and enjoy a break from the housework and childcare. My parents are happy to see their grandchildren, and the kids have fun playing with their grandparents. It works out as a happy arrangement for everyone in our family.

But the flip side is that if I couldn’t do what I wanted while my husband had all the freedom, I’d probably lose it and be furious… (So, no, I’m definitely not a perfect wife w)

Ever since we got married, my husband has told me:

“If you want to be a full-time homemaker, go for it. If you want to work, then work. If you don’t like cleaning or laundry, we can get robot appliances or hire a housekeeping service. Whatever you do, just do what you want and make sure you’re happy.”

And he has stood by those words. Whether I was pushing myself so hard at work that my health suffered, decided to step back from work and focus on raising the kids, or started this blog because I wanted something to devote myself to beyond parenting and contribute to society, he always quietly supported me, saying, “Do what you want, the way you want to.”

That’s why I hope I can support him, too, by standing by the things he wants to do and the things he loves.

We’re hardly experts on marriage, but after all we’ve experienced together, I’ve come to believe that a healthy amount of space and mutual respect are essential in a marriage.

Because I trust him, I don’t feel the need to interfere. And when I see him take on things I could never do with such ease, or carry his responsibilities and overcome whatever comes his way, I find myself thinking, “Go on as many solo road trips as you like.”

I’ll keep cheering him on as he heads out alone. And the funny thing is, I used to have absolutely no interest in cars, but now I find myself hoping he’ll one day make his dream of spending a solid month on the road come true. I can’t help but marvel at how skillfully he’s managed to win me over w